Nomads trip in Belgrade 2012

Belgrade is far better than i imagined….a beautiful well maintained modern and vibrant city with friendly inhabitants “including the taxi drivers” and a road system that actually works!

The trip to Belgrade however was exactly how i imagined, as we took a coach instead of a ride with Assen and his girlfriend Nora as we fully expected Grigor to be in the same car which may have led to our deaths by means of suffocation.

I traveled on the thursday with Daniel our Polish winger, who insisted he was only really there for the beer….and the legend that is urban Chapolino. Daniel sat next to an old fella who wanted a chat so decided music via his earphones was the better option.

Chapolino in the meantime had befriended a lovely French girl and was happily chatting away…..I’m sure she was fully convinced we were one of the best teams in Europe by the time we arrived in Belgrade!

As usual i had the worst deal and ended up at the back of the coach with an overweight middle aged gal “probably about my age actually.” She thankfully spoke little English as she had the breath of a shit eating dog with severe gum disease.

We arrived at the border where the ever alert customs officer asked me “where u bin”? I answered Bulgaria which was obviously the correct answer as he let me straight through with my concealed weapons and 20 kilos of the finest cannabis available in the Balkans.

Despite the fact there were no toilet facilities and the old gal began smelling of urine the rest of the journey was pretty much acceptable and by this time i was sitting alongside Chapolino’s new French female friend who was great company and obviously flossed and brushed her teeth at least once a week!

On arrival at the hotel, the reception manager asked us if we were happy to pay a deposit of sixty million dinars “about twenty eight euros” and after a few minutes we were shown to our rooms which had clean sheets, hot running water, and a rocking chair posing as a toilet…..but hey what can you expect for sixty million dinars??!!

Kris and his wife arrived as we were leaving the hotel but had already decided on a quiet night with a nice bottle of Bordeaux and some and a meal rather than half a dozen beers and some dirty jokes about mice shagging elephants. We were praying Kris would still be alive the next morning when his wife had seen the hotel room but luckily as you can see in the photos he escaped with just a black eye and a broken nose.

So we went out and drank beer in a tented bar in what Chapolino described as a Tsunami “it rained in sheets not drops” and we had a table underneath what looked like a waterfall. For the rest of the night we drank some great beer and discussed tactics like maybe if we avoid getting paralytic tomorrow we wont be sick during the game!

Friday was the day the rest of the troops “legion” arrived and at 5.30 we met Ivo and his girlfriend…Ivo’s organisational skills are almost of German standards…..

We also met our president Schatti who is in fact German and organised plus Grigor, Svetlo, Ivalyo, Stefan, Chefo, and Bobi for what Chapolino described as a warm up for the night ahead!!!

Later on we met in reception where strangely all the guys assembled 10 minutes early but despite me arriving ten minutes later i was heckled for my punctuality!

We had a nice Serbian meal plus the only black wine in the world after which Ivo thought it would be an excellent idea to go to an Irish bar where purely by coincidence his team Barcelona were playing Bilbao in the final of the Copa Del Reya.

By this time the Turkish nomadic legend Tansu had arrived from Sarajevo with his wife…and despite the Guinness not being up to McCarthys Sofia standards a great night was had by all.

Saturday arrived and we set off on a bus tour of Belgrade which Ivo and his girlfriend kindly sorted out again.

It was an eye opener for me as i saw Belgrade in all its glory …it’s a truly magical place and i must admit it was a bit of a surprise albeit a very nice one! We were told that one of the worlds first three cameras was used to take photos of the city and some of the oldest photographs in the world are housed in a building near the centre…..Although I’m not so sure of this as Chapolino seems to have been posting photos on Facebook for an eternity!

There is also a statue of a naked man which was built over a century ago and is high on a hill as the locals didn’t want to view his private parts at close range. They had an erection on the photo that Chapo took but not on the one by Kris……Very strange but very true!!!

At the end of the bus trip Kris was also surprised when the French commentary said they hoped he and his wife had a nice tour and also hoped they had enjoyed the orgasm…..Translation can be a wonderful thing sometimes!!

Finally the game was close and the Nomads are ready to rock and roll….We arrived at the ground situated on a picturesque island next to the Danube and the other not so famous river. We were greeted by Oleg who i was told was one of Nomads finest ex players…He later lived up to his illustrious reputation. He told us the team we were playing were very strong so we decided to play in golf spikes to even things out a little.

Things were going well with Oleg and Assen causing problems up front and Svet, Kris and Ivo strong at the back.

At half time it was still 0-0. It stayed that way till 20 minutes from the end when a long range effort by a serbian midfielder hit the top corner of the Nomads net!

The Nomads spirit shone through though and Assen rose above the Serbian centre back to power in a header which the goalkeeper could only parry into the path the poacher that is Ivalyo and we were level!!

It stayed that way till the end and the Nomads had shown their true spirit…….viva la Nomads!!!!!

Saturday was a great night in an awesome restaurant which is apparently one of the oldest in Europe….The food was great but the women were even better yeeehaah…. I think one women actually smiled at me but she was a little crossed eyed so i cant be sure!

Later we went to a great club on the river and drank more beer and got neck ache due to the amount of mini skirted girls walking by.

So all in all it was an awesome time with some brilliant people….THE NOMADS!! Hope we can do it again soon and hope the guys who missed this trip will try and make the next one….You missed a great time!

Thanks Ivo everything you arranged was brilliant and Belgrade is the best….They even serve my daughters favorite coffee “flat white”.

Cheers Nomads i will remember this trip for a long time to come…but i think Kris will remember his bus journey for even longer hehe.

Up Nomads!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tagged Belgrade, Serbia, Travel